Articles like this piss me

Articles like this piss me off.

It’s quite obvious to me, someone who can’t even claim that he knows anything about webdesign, that Valerie Casey is merely diddling on Jakob Nielsen’s name so that she can grab some of his spotlight. I’m almost suprised that she didn’t add how FreeBSD rules, Slashdot sucks, Microsoft is the devil, and how she was so much more three-one-three-three-seven than all of us because she hacked a Gibson.

However, there’s a lot of people that will blindly listen to her febrile puke, and continue to build irritating Flash sites that contain nothing interesting and take fifteen minutes to load.

She says, “I don’t think my users are dumb.” No, Ms Casey, your users aren’t dumb. We are in a hurry, and if your dorky Shockwave bouncing testicle polishing creme animation doesn’t hurry up and load so that we can find the index to your page and get the real data we want, we’re going elsewhere. And furthermore, Ms Casey, if you continue to say, in soothing Scientologist tones, that it’s ok for people to continue to use triply-compressed looped samples of the Care Bears theme song as the background music for their awful Tripod homepages, we will be forced to come over there and lodge a pen firmly in your trachea.

I don’t have a problem with Flash. The whole point of the Web is to deliver information, and deliver it in huge hot steaming bucketfuls at near lightspeed. If the information you need to deliver requires you to use Flash and Shockwave and XML and Java and thirty trained midgets wearing strap-on webcams –well, so be it! If it doesn’t, save yourself a lot of effort, and save me a lot of time, and just do the damned page in plain HTML. By hand. With notepad.