Yes, my children, I am alive!

After a harrowing trip inside a flying washing machine, I slept for about fourteen hours, and I’m now back to my regular vampire routine. I have several pictures for you all, such as the beach I didn’t go to, the beautiful woman I never met, or the huge Hawaiian plant that decided to be my special friend.

Again, many special thanks to my pals Joseph and Michelle, who housed and fed me during my stay. This is a picture of the gate to the house they just bought. Yep, those are genuine 18th-century copper lions. I lust.