Laura’s Toes

When I was bored and unwilling to do work, I asked Laura to tell me a story.

Laura: “I used to have 7 toes on each foot, but I had the extras removed. I keep the extras in a pickle jar full of vodka. Only 3 are left though because, once, someone ate one thinking it was a Vienna sausage.”

Me: “Aww, Poor missing toes! You could tape the old ones on?”

Laura: “But then I’d have to keep my feet in vodka.”

Me: “You could save on nail polish, if the vodka were colored. And if you could convince your flesh to act like celery, you could have hair that matched the color of your vodka-soaked toes.”

“Just don’t light a match.”

“Why’s Laura bald?”

“She had to pickle her spare toes.”

“Oh.”